I Don’t Think I Have Much Time Left January 10, 2009
Posted by mike in Uncategorized.trackback
As you may or may not know, we are getting slammed with a pretty nasty snowstorm here in Michigan. Of course if you live in the US and watch any of the major networks (which are all located on the east coast), you are probably only aware that a snowstorm somewhere out there in America is heading towards New York City where it will wreak havoc on the only city in America that counts.
Ummm guess what national news fucks who don’t know that a world exists in America beyond the boundaries of New York City? We already know that a bad storm is raging and we don’t really give a flying fuck what happens in New York City.
Anyway that has nothing to do with why I don’t think I don’t have much time left as the title might or might not have implied.
I’ve done a bad bad bad thing and my days are numbered:
Black Kitty of Death accidentally got buried in an avalanche and as you can plainly see, he is not happy. I have not seen him since this little “accident,” but I feel his presence.
UPDATE: I didn’t do this. Jackie did. She’s the bad one. Not me. BK of D will just have to take out his wrath on her and leave me alone.
May God have mercy on your soul.
I agree, may God have mercy on your nasty soul!
Beach–My fate is sealed.
Catalyst–No, Jackie did it. I swear.
The coldest pussy you have ever had.
Nice, so that is the paltry snow we are getting now?
When we get good drifts, Mr. Chili likes to grab whatever kitty has the misfortune of being within his reach and tossing said kitty over the porch railing and into said drift. Often, black kitties COMPLETELY disappear in the snow and ALWAYS, none is happy to be near him for the rest of the afternoon…
All that snow is headed here. They’re talking just short of a foot in my neighborhood. We’ll see how close they get.
Atlas–Not only is it the coldest, but it is the blackest pussy I have ever had as well.
Malach–Oh that’s right, you live on the east coast. I think we got about 10 inches and it is still coming down. According to the east coast media that we here in the unknown parts of America are forced to watch, you better plan on evacuating.
Mrs. C–Sorry, you sneaked in on me while I was commenting to Atlas and Malach. You can’t see it, but I used BK of D to sweep off the railing on the deck…..
I mean Jackie did it. Not me.
Poor bastard!
Say, my girlfriend is from St. Clair. Ever hear of it? Are THEY currently covered in snow to their crotches? Or higher?
ParadOx–Yes, I have heard of it. I was over there last fall when I was heading up into The Thumb area of Michigan. It’s really pretty over there. Looking at the map, I think they got less than we did. This storm was mostly along the border of Ohio and Michigan. I live about 50 miles from the border, so we are taking a direct hit.
Black pussy, white pussy, doesn’t matter. It’s all pink on the inside.
that is a cat with a vengeance mission
Atlas–But it’s been so long…..
Rosie–I refuse to sleep.
That cat looks pissed. I can understand that. I’d be pissed too if someone buried me in snow (when I was wearing nothing but a fur coat) and then subjected me to the indignity of taking a photo of the whole thing.
He’s SO going to get you back.
x
Those yellow eyes say that everyone is going to pay…
Kitty–I made it through the night, but not without some problems. He sat on my back and purred for a long time. I think he was just reminding me that he could kill me any time he wanted to.
Colonel–He does look like he has an agenda, doesn’t he?
Careful Mike, I stumbled across this while looking for porn. I think BKoD has it out for you!
http://bkod.livejournal.com/589.html
Vic–Nice find. I am glad to know that someone’s got my back….other than BK of D!
Oh, and did you find any good porn?
BKoD is going to kill you all. You say Jackie did it? Well, you made Jackie so you are responsible too. Run away as fast as you can!
That page from Vic… hahahaha.
He sat on my back and purred for a long time. I think he was just reminding me that he could kill me any time he wanted to.
Yep. That’s what he was doing.
I don’t why, I just love him so much! I wish I could have him when you move. My Andy would bitch slap me though.
Chickie–I am pretty sure I have him convinced Jackie did it. He’s been keeping a close eye on her all day long.I don’t blame him. I would too. She is not to be trusted.
Melissa–That is hilarious. I am so glad Vic “found” that for all of us to see. I should just pack him up and send him to you Melissa. Jackie is trying to steal him from me and I would rather send him far far away than have that happen.
1. We got snow yesterday, for about 2 fucking minutes. Snow whores!
2. You are fucked. And I would say have mercy on your soul, but anyone who buries demon cat in snow apparently does not have a soul to worry about, so they go about doing crazy shit like that.
3.) Snow Whore.
Trying to steal him? Too late for that.
MI–What, the east coast got snow for two minutes and we didn’t get a news bulletin about it here from the networks???? How the hell did they miss that one. I know it is only a matter of time before BK of D shreds me.
Jackie–Yes, trying to steal him. You have not stolen him yet.
Ahhh, but did kitty see Jackie do it?? She may think it was you even if you were totally innocent….
Ryan Seacrest was not available to cover the news as he is busy working Idol right now. That is why you missed the 2 minutes of snow. Duh.
Diva–Jackie is sneaky like that. She will do things to the Kitty and then blame me for it. This is just another example of her trying to make me look bad in front of BK of D.
MI–That gives me a great idea. We could start doing news stories about how disasters in America effected the east coast. You know things like: “HURRICANE KATRINA STRIKES THE GULF COAST. NEW YORKERS INCONVENIENCED BY THE LOSS OF ATTENTION.
Yes. You are totally fucked. And not in a good way.
HT/GT–Do you think KY or vaseline would help? My butt hurts already.
I am sure poor little BKofD is plotting….
The purring is just to throw you off guard!
HTGT is such a wise woman. Kinda like me.
How on earth did you manage to get BK of D to sit still for the photo? I’d say beware of any pussy that purrs , theres always an ulterior motive ! Doubt whether blaming Jackie will do it somehow — those eyes say it all.
–Also , how is the beard growing going ?? or have you already had one close shave ?
Awww poor cat. I wish we had proper weather like you have. When it snows here we get a measley inch or two – not enough to bury a cat, that’s for sure.
Thanks for letting me find you again!
NYC is going to be very cold toward the end of this week. I’m not able to concentrate on anything else right now.
Meggie–He is definitely plotting. Last night while I was sleeping, he woke me up by sitting next to me and staring at me. It was freaky.
MI–Yes, you are both wise beyond your
pantsyears.Henri–I don’t know how Jackie got BK of D to sit still for that photo (wink, wink), I’ll have to ask her.
I let the beard grow for a month and just got tired of it. I was surprised that it actually came in this time. I think if I’d left it on for another month, it would have looked okay.
RB–I don’t want to say anything bad about Black Kitty of Death, but if anyone deserves to be buried in a snowbank, it is him. He is the devil. I am glad you found me again too!
Hungry Mother–We are supposed to get a few more inches of snow tomorrow and then it is going to turn cold here too. I hope that doesn’t cause too many problems for NYC. I would hate to inconvenience them.
You could make one of those anti-motivational posters with this picture, with the caption “Revenge is a dish best served COLD.”
Phoebe–Oh Christ, that is just beautiful.
LMAO @ Phoebe! So … any fallout yet?
Sara Sue–He has slept right next to me every night since that happened. Last night he actually slept all curled up in my arms. I am afraid. Very afraid.
Check your pillow for a pile of shit.
[...] few days ago, Mike wrote about how he didn’t drop the Black Kitty of Death in a snowbank. I laughed about this because it’s an annual tradition for Mr. Chili to find a cat, usually [...]